Being a Mother

The moment the purple tinged baby boy is placed in my arms, I am lost. I love him completely with my entire being. I will do anything for this child. And the feeling is the same with the next. But with the next also comes fear, sorrow and the resolve to do everything in my power to ensure this little one gets a fair shot at life as he clings to life in the NICU, attached to IV's, oxygen and countless other wires.
They are now both strong healthy boys, nine and almost six. They are growing up, and with that comes a new fear. How long is my nine year old going to want my hugs and kisses? How much longer will I be able to carry my baby to bed, his feet dangling past my knees? How do I stop them from leaving me?
As mothers we all encourage our children to that next step, learning to crawl, then to walk and talk, ride a bike, drive a car, but one day they will leave and I will be left alone. Alone to worry and fret, are they getting enough sleep, are they eating right, are they being safe? Worrying if they can make it on their own, and knowing I can't make it without them.
I rejoice in the time I have with my exuberant boys, rejoice in the love they show me and the kisses and cuddles they let me give them. But most of all, I rejoice because they chose me, as imperfect as can be, but who loves them with every fiber of her being. On this Mother's Day, I recognize the love and honor my boys have for me. On this day, I am thankful I have one of the most important jobs in this world. Being a mother!! I am THEIR mother!